Coping
There are a number of coping techniques that I find useful in helping me cope with my anxious feelings. You may find some of these useful too.
Deep breaths
Take a deep breath and hold it for a short while. Then allow yourself to exhale slowly. Repeat this process a couple more times. Whilst trying this technique feel your pulse, you should notice that the effect of holding your breath is to slow down your heart rate and hence your pulse will appear slower. This technique is often used by sports men and women before carrying out an action; say when serving a volley in tennis for example. It allows one to be more in control of the action one is about to take.
Autogencics
This requires the person to learn a partiuliar form of relaxation. Having learned how to relax over a number of repeated exercises, the idea is to be able to allow yourself to apply that relaxation at will. I have dedicated a separate page for the sole purpose of learning how to use autogenics.
Get out clause
One technique I find useful in helping me to cope with a stressful situation is to give myself a "get out" clause.
I can best explain this by telling you how I was able to attend my best friend's funeral. I was nervous that I would be locked into a room full of people until the ceremony was over. I knew that this was likely to trigger my feelings of anxiety. The first thing I did was to speak to the person who was in charge of the ceremony and asked that should I need to leave the ceremony half way through, then would I be allowed to? His now obvious reply, was of course a reassuring "yes you can leave at any stage of the ceremony". This enabled me to attend and actually stay through to the end of the ceremony. I can only assume that this type of anxiety is akin to claustrophobia, so if you suffer from that you may wish to try out this technique too.
Reassure yourself in a positive way
Whilst it can be extremely difficult to identify yourself having a negative thought about a situation, it may be useful to turn that negative thought into a positive thought. Again if I can use the example of my friend's funeral, whilst I was feeling extremely sad at his loss, I reassured myself that should he be able to help me in any way, (wherever he was), then I am sure he was trying to help me. This sense of reassurance helped me in overcoming the levels of anxiety that would have otherwise kept me away from his funeral. This is only one example of reassurance and I leave it to youself to identify more.
Distraction
If something is bothering you and playing heavily on your mind, simply switch your thoughts onto something else that takes your mind away from the offending thoughts. This can be a quick and effective tool in helping you deal with anxious thoughts.
Seek help
By reading this, I can only assume that you have started to seek ways in which you may be helped with your problem.
At a simple level, if you have a close friend, you may find it reassuring to have that friend accompany you to which ever function you are having difficulty in attending. Whilst this doesn't alleviate the actual anxiety problem it may help to alleviate some of the anxiety symptoms.
Hypnosis/relaxation tapes
Seeking help from a hypnotist may help. Usually you will be required to pay a fee each time you attend a hypnosis session. These sessions take the form of getting you to relax, and whilst you are in that relaxed state, useful suggestions are made to you from the hypnotist. The idea is that whilst you are relaxed your mind is more ready to take on board helpful ideas to improve your condition, and you are more likely to remember them. You may be provided with relaxation CD's, videos or tapes that you use for homework. Some of these may contain subliminal messages in order to achieve a relaxed and positive state of mind.
Professional help
If you really are unable to cope with the anxieties that trouble you, then seek professional advice. Go to your doctor, who may recommend that you be referred to a clinical psychologist. The doctor may prescribe medicines to alleviate your symptoms, but these may not address the root causes of the problem.
Deep breaths
Take a deep breath and hold it for a short while. Then allow yourself to exhale slowly. Repeat this process a couple more times. Whilst trying this technique feel your pulse, you should notice that the effect of holding your breath is to slow down your heart rate and hence your pulse will appear slower. This technique is often used by sports men and women before carrying out an action; say when serving a volley in tennis for example. It allows one to be more in control of the action one is about to take.
Autogencics
This requires the person to learn a partiuliar form of relaxation. Having learned how to relax over a number of repeated exercises, the idea is to be able to allow yourself to apply that relaxation at will. I have dedicated a separate page for the sole purpose of learning how to use autogenics.
Get out clause
One technique I find useful in helping me to cope with a stressful situation is to give myself a "get out" clause.
I can best explain this by telling you how I was able to attend my best friend's funeral. I was nervous that I would be locked into a room full of people until the ceremony was over. I knew that this was likely to trigger my feelings of anxiety. The first thing I did was to speak to the person who was in charge of the ceremony and asked that should I need to leave the ceremony half way through, then would I be allowed to? His now obvious reply, was of course a reassuring "yes you can leave at any stage of the ceremony". This enabled me to attend and actually stay through to the end of the ceremony. I can only assume that this type of anxiety is akin to claustrophobia, so if you suffer from that you may wish to try out this technique too.
Reassure yourself in a positive way
Whilst it can be extremely difficult to identify yourself having a negative thought about a situation, it may be useful to turn that negative thought into a positive thought. Again if I can use the example of my friend's funeral, whilst I was feeling extremely sad at his loss, I reassured myself that should he be able to help me in any way, (wherever he was), then I am sure he was trying to help me. This sense of reassurance helped me in overcoming the levels of anxiety that would have otherwise kept me away from his funeral. This is only one example of reassurance and I leave it to youself to identify more.
Distraction
If something is bothering you and playing heavily on your mind, simply switch your thoughts onto something else that takes your mind away from the offending thoughts. This can be a quick and effective tool in helping you deal with anxious thoughts.
Seek help
By reading this, I can only assume that you have started to seek ways in which you may be helped with your problem.
At a simple level, if you have a close friend, you may find it reassuring to have that friend accompany you to which ever function you are having difficulty in attending. Whilst this doesn't alleviate the actual anxiety problem it may help to alleviate some of the anxiety symptoms.
Hypnosis/relaxation tapes
Seeking help from a hypnotist may help. Usually you will be required to pay a fee each time you attend a hypnosis session. These sessions take the form of getting you to relax, and whilst you are in that relaxed state, useful suggestions are made to you from the hypnotist. The idea is that whilst you are relaxed your mind is more ready to take on board helpful ideas to improve your condition, and you are more likely to remember them. You may be provided with relaxation CD's, videos or tapes that you use for homework. Some of these may contain subliminal messages in order to achieve a relaxed and positive state of mind.
Professional help
If you really are unable to cope with the anxieties that trouble you, then seek professional advice. Go to your doctor, who may recommend that you be referred to a clinical psychologist. The doctor may prescribe medicines to alleviate your symptoms, but these may not address the root causes of the problem.